Austin Gorilla Run

There are lots of ways to unleash your inner beast, be it throwing on the big wheels at the gym, training in martial arts, or stripping nude, painting yourself blue, reading biochemistry texts, and speaking with perfect Grammer. Encouraging the costume route sans the hyper-intelligence, Austin Gorilla Run.

A 5k downtown dash starting and ending at 4th & Lavaca, the AGR is a festively absurd alternative to the typical fun-run that benefits the Dian Fossey-inspired Mountain Gorilla Conservation Fund, which would've been financially set had Koko not squandered her TV money earning the nickname "The Blow-land Gorilla". Simply register, select a suit size (medium, large, or silverback -- and it's yours to keep!), opt to pick up said suit or have it mailed, and start fundraising (suggested goal's $250); then on race day augment your costume however you desire (other cities've seen everything from Santa suits, to Viking-Apes, to...boobs), and get to/from Fado's Irish Pub by any means desired, whether it's walking, running, unicycling, or skateboarding, a fine way to show people you haven't evolved that much. Afterwards, Fado's sponsoring a lunch & afterparty, with live music provided by Achachay! -- local funk-rockers whose current tour's seemingly contrary goal is "to lower the drinking age and bring people...consciousness".

Should you not be bananas about participating but still want to contribute, the MGCF has partnered with Wynkoop Brewery on a charity-minded Silverback Smoked Porter and Pale Ale -- Xceed your capacity, and the Night Crawler will be you.

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