Helping you decide what to enrich your mind with

Books are a huge time investment, so it's wise to seek some guidance before choosing your next tome, instead of just waiting in a word-less limbo for Oprah to announce whether or not you'll ever read again. Ready to steer you right, just-launched The Staff Recommends.

Curated by a McSweeney's editor/lit blogger, TSR is the online, actually legible equivalent of one of those indie bookstore clerk recommendations, giving you a no-nonsense directive to pick a page-turner instead of something that'll just sit on your bookshelf until the Year of the Depend Adult Undergarment, which you'd know all about if finishing Infinite Jest was more of a finite goal. The site combats cover-judging with their own concise reviews (~3 paragraphs), while also providing excerpts, buy links from online sellers including e-book shops, and links to other credible bookworms, like the NY Times, The New Yorker, and NPR -- though if you're looking for a review of Sh*t, I Wish I Didn't Say That, you'll have to go to Fox. The first rec's Skippy Dies by Paul Murray, chronicling the events leading to the titular teenage protagonist's sudden demise in a donut-eating contest with his bestie, "VonBlowjob", delivering equal parts heartbreak and the "wisdom of the fourteen-year-old male on subjects like whether or not mermaids are desirable sexual partners" -- the obvious answer being to just mer-man up and chase that tail.

Although TSR openly refers to itself as an "advertorial publication" and makes money from publishers, they swear to Joyce that they'd never recommend anything that isn't worth the paper it's printed on, assuring you'll never crawl into bed with a novel, and wake up in a House of Sand and Fog.