Food & Drink

Tasty Healthy Meals

There's nothing like a nourishing, home-cooked meal to make you sit back and reflect, "Jesus, are mom and dad thinking about divorce? They've been married, like, longer than I've been alive." Get nourished in the comfort of your broken home, with Tasty Healthy Meals. Conceived by a 19-year restaurant-industry vet, THM's a bare-bones, hardwood-floored operation dominated by two huge fridges stuffed with healthy, single-serving prepared meals, all available for in-store purchase or delivery -- which is a fancy way of saying "available for delivery". The whopping 32 entrees contain no sugar or preservatives, and include everything from time-intensive meat options (Cuban beef w/ black beans and whole-grain rice; turkey meatloaf w/ sweet potatoes and green beans; apricot-stuffed pork loin) to Asian specialties like Pork Satay (w/ vegetables or noodles) and chicken wraps made using the ancient Thai technique of...rolling up a bunch of ingredients in a tortilla. Also on the menu are pasta dishes, chili, vegan options, breakfast tacos & muffins, desserts, and kids meals including PB&J's with the crusts cut off, which come with a side of a huge fifth grade kid who'll wait by your garbage cans to punch you in the arm every morning for a month. Delivery's best handled in moderate bulk, as orders over $30 are free; unless otherwise requested, they'll show up the next business day, when you can either receive them personally or leave them a cooler to insure freshness. Delivery's also gratis for anyone who hires THM's sister company More Hands for housecleaning -- the very service your dad's insensitively expected from your mom for, like, 30 years.