Toddland

There are no rules in a fantasy world: you can stop time or fight underwater monsters, or even build a nuclear arsenal and kidnap beautiful actresses from neighboring countries with absolutely no repercussions. Running their fashion biz with unrestrained whimsy, Toddland

Just gracing Austin with their goods, Toddland are a group of designers, photogs, and artists who left Paul Frank to found a casual-wear company so...casual, they feel perfectly comfortable telling customers things like "If you like stuff a little looser, we recommend going up a size, or going to the gym. It's your call, fatty. Thank you -- the Toddland department of snuggly fits."

Each piece is affixed with a "certificate of awesomeness", with their pride and joy being "The Greatest Pants in the Universe", a sheen 65/35 poly-cotton blend number available in 8 colors (classic khaki to burgundy and royal blue), and which they claim are "the pants God would wear if he wore pants"; they've also got a shorts remix of the same model, as well as the Shipwreck Short, super-washed with frayed hems and a vintage coconut button at the fly (directly above your peen-a colada).

Available online-only are top-halfers from the 80s-looking longsleeve V-neck Raglan ("so cool it might reverse global warning"), to the Eagle vs. Shark tee (inspired by the Flight of the Conchords' guy's movie), to the burgundy nylon Coaches Jacket, which they say "does not entitle you to yell at kids and tell them they're no good at baseball...and that the only reason they're on the team is because you have a thing for their mom." So basically, it should just be called "Jacket".

Since Toddland's affordable price point will probably leave you with extra green, they also sell whimsical wallets like the Deliciousness (burger-shaped with puffy bun exterior) and the You Want Fries With That -- both reminders of things you can eat as much of as you want to with absolutely no repercussions. Fatty.