Food & Drink

The P*ssy Room

There's a certain part of a woman's anatomy so taboo, mentioning it in polite company is considered social suicide -- on the other hand, naming a room in your bar after it is socially awesome. Well, Seattle, step into The P*ssy Room.

The Proom's a brand new, sporadically open lounge housed inside the Copper Gate, Ballard's Aquavit-happy Scandinavian mainstay, which even without a space dedicated to the P was already pretty F'd, what with its master-shipwright-constructed, dragon-headed Viking-ship bar and extensive vintage erotica display, a motif they've fantastically dubbed "Scandalnavian". Opposite a lovingly restored nude mural of the Gate's original burlesque-dancer owner (whose own "gate" was apparently copper), hidden behind the massive prow of the bar, and adjacent to the made-you-look tranny-arted men's room, you'll find an inconspicuous passage leading to the clitoral-surmounted, velvet curtained, undulating-pink-walled entry (seriously) that gives the new space its name. Pass through, and you'll find a "little pearl of a performance space" (room for 20-30 people max), decorated with mirrors, red-velvet upholstery, and a back-lit wall of Champagne; the space'll be open mainly for intimate jazz and rock shows including the legendary Mexican Elvis "El Vez" (a.k.a., "The Thin Brown Duke"), plus periodic burlesque/erotic circus-style acts -- which, given his penchant for skin-tight tiger-striped jumpsuits, could also involve El Vez.

As for the most crucial part of the evening -- periodically relieving yourself -- the Proom boasts a tiny white-tiled bathroom, equipped with a working shower and shielded only by a velvet curtain, scant protection against you committing social suicide by bedecking the Proom in another kind of P altogether.