Cans of beer, shuffleboard, beer pong & more

There are many reasons to think Manhattan would never have a country club, from there not being enough space to build a golf course, to there being too many Jews to effectively keep out. Nonetheless, the Greenwich Village Country Club has addressed such issues (miniaturized the golf, not run by a bunch of anti-Semitic d*cks, etc.) in turning the massive Carnival space into a Shangri-La of links and libations. Your first look:

Par-Tee Lounge: Step inside and you'll hit an AstroTurf area sporting pool/air hockey/shuffleboard tables, an upside-down alligator-skin golf hole on the ceiling, and beers ranging from drafts of Goose Island IPA, to cans of Foster's and Porkslap served in paper bags, as country club members always enjoy Taking It To The Streets.

The Mini-Golf Course and Fairway: Most of the considerable square footage is consumed by a large sand bocce court, a beer pong arena, and the aforementioned fenced-in mini golf course, whose nine holes are guarded by animals, from a giraffe, to a lion, to...holy crap, is that John Daly?! Sorry...false alarm, it's just a gorilla. A massive, shirtless gorilla.

The Clubhouse: Should you want to run game yourself, this sequestered, bottle service-pushing lounge/club features a topiary-lined entrance, and a dance floor surrounded by curved banquettes and plaid couches rocking AstroTurf accents, which, given the success of Ryan "The Hebrew Hammer" Braun, apparently isn't very effective at keeping the Jews out anymore either.