The Eastside's massive new shooting range

The apocalypse's imminent arrival means you need to start preparing now, by saving up for water purifiers, hoarding vegetable seeds, and keeping a vigilant watch for when John Cusack attempts to rent a plane. Giving you the skills you'll need when the unprepared inevitably turn into zombies, West Coast Armory.

Operated in conjunction with the Bellevue Gun Club, this giant 31,000sqft shooting facility'll prep you w/ firearm safety/defensive shooting lessons, ply you with ammo and other gear from its pro shop, then let you pretend you know what you're doing with a variety of guns (from Berettas, to Glocks, to .45s, to even an AR-15 semi-automatic rifle), on a hilarious range of un-dead paper targets, including a zombie blond, and a Nazi, so start preparing your hilarious Inglorious Basterds quotes now! Target shooting (zombie or otherwise) takes place in 22 ballistic material clad shooting lanes split between pistol and rifle bays that're kept haze free by smoke-grenade tested air filters; there's also a training bay that hosts weekly rifle and pistol competitions where you earn points for shooting at multiple targets, from behind cover, and sometimes under difficult conditions like strobe lights, in case they do end up finding you in da club. Shooting requires an annual membership, which range from the super affordable $10 bronze level that gets you access to the pistol bay for a small fee, to a series of options for serious gun enthusiasts that offer unlimited access to both the bays, guest privileges, and free gun rentals; plus women shoot free on ladies day, neatly cinching up your plans for next Valentine's Day.

Future plans include firearm sales, the chance to shoot 270 degrees at reactive steel targets, and building a "shoot house" for dynamic entry training, a la the movie SWAT, whose sequel is currently in production, and if you need one more sign the end is near, look up and wave to John.