Crest 3D White 2 Hour Express Whitestrips are clearly the next big thing in tooth-nology -- so big, Crest is offering them right now in a special pre-sale in preparation for what's sure to be a demand so huge, it'll make that block-long line of teenagers who'll totally freak out if they don't get to see (insert band you've never heard of) seem tiny by comparison. Here are ten rock-solid reasons you should pre-order yours right now:
1) Pre-ordering gets you a special gift: 25% more product, plus a free Crest 3D White MultiCare Whitening Rinse – retail value $19. More is good. Free is good. More + Free = gooood.
2) Use it, and you'll experience dramatic improvement that very same day, because unlike that struggling actor that just took your order for huevos rancheros, life won't wait.
3) The treatment provides noticeable whitening in just 2 hours-one hour and fourteen minutes less than that movie about the poor guy and the rich girl and the iceberg.
4) Now your smile will prove that, martial arts heroes and bald comics aside, you're the real Glimmer Man.
5) Because the Advanced Seal Technology keeps the Strips gripped to your teeth, you can go about your normal business during that 2 hours. Or your abnormal business -- no judgements here.
6) Your results from 1 treatment will last up to 3 months -- that's an entire college football season, minus bowls named after gardening tools.
7) Teeth are the windows to the soul. Sorry, "eyes".
8) You'll be the first kid on the block with Crest-bright teeth, even cooler than when you were the first kid on the block with the unicycle-skateboard hybrid known at first as the Uniboard, then later as the Uni-bored.
9) Why give up coffee and/or wine if you don't have to?
10) Look where a gorgeous smile has gotten the Vice President!
You'd have to be almost pathologically contrarian not to agree that those are 10 really, really solid reasons for pre-ordering. If you're not convinced, you're just going to have to take a test drive -- so drop your fingers to the keyboard, and get hooked up at 3DWhite.com.