With the fuzz flooding Southie, it's worth considering creating your own tomfoolery this year. We talked to the guys behind The Irish Village in Brighton to provide you the necessary festive ammo.
Irish Games: Road Bowling Like regular bowling, it can be played in teams, partners, or individually. Go out into the street (works best with a decently tranquil, straight road). Find yourself a rock. Attempt to roll it bowling-style down the street, while keeping it in the confines of said road. Person or team that rolls the rock the farthest without going off the road wins. Losers drink first, then the winners drink, then the dude whose windshield you just cracked takes whatever you've got left.
Irish Toasts: The Bellicose Mouse Option Some Guinness was spilt on the barroom floor When the pub was shut for the night. When out of his hole crept a wee brown mouse And stood in the pale moonlight. He lapped up the frothy foam from the floor Then back on his haunches he sat. And all night long, you could hear the mouse roar, "Bring on the goddamn cat!"
The Handsomely Nostalgic and Poignant Option Fill with mingled cream and amber, I will drain that glass again. Such hilarious visions clamber Through the chamber of my brain. Quaintest thoughts, queerest fancies Come to life and fade away. What care I how time advances; I am drinking ale today. (single tear for effect)
Irish Drinking Songs: For your slurring pleasure, we've compiled a playlist of unapologetic Irish scream-alongs, encapsulating drunken funerals (Finnegan's Wake, The Body of an American), Satan References (The Devil's Dance Floor, Whiskey, You're The Devil) and The Parting Glass, a classic Irish ballad letting people know that they don't have to go home, but they absolutely should.
Get up on the entire mix here