Approaching women in bars can be tricky: come on too weak and you risk looking like a pansy, come on too strong, and you end up looking like Mike Katz, which is terrible as that dude can't ever find his shirt. Or you can avoid the risk altogether and just Hire a Boston Wingwoman.
Because "they're better at picking up women than you are," HBWW's a just-launched service from a Framingham native/UMass sociology grad eager to escape a career in the medical equipment biz, which lets you hire an attractive outgoing woman by the hour to break the ice/approach chicks while out on the town, but not out on The Town, because then your only option is Warren Tavern. Here's how it goes down: after deciding how many hours you want to be out (2 hr minimum), you'll be contacted to discuss pertinent deets like where you live, what type of lady friends you're trying to meet (20-somethings, young professionals, tattoo artists, cougars), and possible trolling grounds; based on said chat, they'll set you up with one of 12 women and even recommend (although you get the final veto) a candidate-rich spot -- so enjoy the State House cafeteria. From there, you'll meet your new hot BFF (since no #'s are exchanged, she'll approach you in the bar) and spend 10-15 min getting comfortable with one another whilst cleverly concocting an intriguing backstory, then sit back and try to look casual as your new "longtime" lady friend candidly walks up to women and slyly draws you into the convo; assuming you make a love connection, your WW can casually retreat back to the bar, or if you want to pull the ripcord she can mock c*ck block and claim you're dating...Patton Oswalt! Gross!!! Not really, she'll claim you're dating her.
Since meeting women is just the beginning, HBWW plans to broaden their portfolio of consulting services to include other dude deficiencies like coaching on talking to women, dealing with tricky relationship issues, and even dressing yourself in something other than a Brady jersey, not that that's a problem for Katz, since Ken Waller stole that thing years ago.