Wild Hill Preserve

Remember when you and your buddy were downing brews, reading Lord of the Flies and he was like, "Dude, I could totally kill a boar."? Well do it p*ssy, at Wild Hill Preserve

Nestled in the wildly independent hills of upper VT, 2000-acre WHP's the oldest hunting preserve open to the public in the Northeast, where you bed down in real-man log cabins (w/ spring-fed running water, battery operated lighting) and eat family-style meals of boar and buffalo, while seeking the eternal glory of pwning seven varieties of wild beast. The road to animal pain starts with testing weapon accuracy on 8-inch targets from 25 feet; you'll then embark upon three hunts (two full days, one half) w/ an "experienced woodsmen" guide, where you'll track the game via stalking, putting on drives, or even letting dogs out, although proper protocol requires clearance from the Baja Men's counsel. Once you've got the prey lined up, you can use Turok-style hunting armaments (hunting bow, crossbow, Revolutionary War style blackpowder pistol, handgun, shotgun, etc) to unleash the fury on varmint like red stags, fallow deer, elk, ram, wild goat, buffalo, and, of course, 200lb Russian wild boar, known for their "unpredictable and dangerous" behavior, which can probably be attributed to the vodka

WHP guarantees you a shot at game, and if you do manage to take a beast down, they have a professional taxidermist and butcher on site that'll do your game up quartered, bone-in, bone-out, or as sausage and bacon, letting you cash in on that brew-towning night you said "I'm so hungry I could eat approximately 1/4 of a red stag right now".