Super Mario Bros. was a right of passage in childhood, from that first time beating it with no warps to that first time beating it to the princess. What, no one else? Aiming to change that, Boobs and Goombas: A Super Mario Burlesque.
In recognition of the 25th anniversary of the original Super Mario release, Gorilla Tango Theater is presenting a bawdy, sexed-up romp celebrating the exploits of the Italian pipe cleaners that's sure to power up your mushroom. The premise is that Mario (played by Coo d'Twat) and Luigi (Lily e'Claire) have become so frustrated by their endless pursuit of Princess Peach that "everything they see has started to look like a beautiful, sexy woman-- even their most dangerous enemies", but then who hasn't thought about boning a weird flying bird-turtle? From there it's a series of classic burlesque tricks performed by a cast that includes Mario mainstays like Goomba (Coco Rufus), Chomper (Hazel Hellbender), Toad (Diva Lavida), and Lacey Lay portraying a fish, which Mario most certainly shouldn't settle for in bed.
If the performers collect enough "coins" (aka tips), it'll unlock a bonus alternate ending -- and if it involves the princess, it'll definitely be a happy one. Right? High five!