You've no doubt seen the Crazy Cart, the stupid-awesome little drifter that can go in just about any direction while facing any other direction. Razor, the company behind it, has just answered your prayers with the shut-up-and-take-my-money grown up version, the Crazy Cart XL, available for preorder now at Toys 'R Us.
It takes everything the original Crazy Cart did to the next level. Designed from the outset for adults, the steel frame can handle anyone up to 300 pounds, and components like the drift bar on the side have been strengthened and improved. In other words, there's almost no chance it'll break down before you fall over from dizziness.
Better still, there's a new, more powerful motor. No, 17 mph might not seem like much, but that's basically the speed of an Olympic 400 meter sprinter. In your living room. Sideways.
It'll go for about 40 minutes on a single charge before you have to swap the rechargeable batteries. The only other thing you need is a really long, narrow, winding hallway.
Aaron Miller is the Rides editor for Supercompressor, and can be found on Twitter. He really wishes he had this back in college. It would've been great in the dorms.