Cars

What Women Really Think About 7 Classic "Car Guy" Cars

You know the drill: guy buys awesome car. Guy gets high fives from all of his car guy friends. Guy gets a, "Yeah, it's nice," from his main squeeze. Trying to decipher exactly what women really think of our rides is far too tough a task for any man, so I asked three women on our staff—Keller, Giselle, and Michelle—for their thoughts on seven all-time classic car guy cars. The results were...enlightening, to say the least.

Alfa Romeo 4C

Name this car.

Giselle: Alfa Romeo 4C. I only know cause we just did a story on it though; without that, I'd be clueless.

Michelle: No idea.

Keller: Sports car of some variety.

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  It's shiny; it looks like it'd be fun to drive.

Michelle: Looks like a bro-ey race car. I think I'd like this more if it were in a different color, like black.

Keller: It’s got this malicious evil look to the front. It's a little try-hard.

Who do you see driving it?

Giselle: A super-flashy showoff.

Michelle: Someone with money in da bank.

Keller: Someone wants to turn heads with this…like, a dad that wants to impress whoever he's golfing with.

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $80,000?

Michelle: I have zero concept of car prices. Like, seriously, zero. The last car I bought was a clunker for $2,000 in 2010, so I unfortunately can't help you with this question.

Keller: I think it’s probably trying to look more expensive than it really is.

Porsche 959

Name this car.

Giselle: A Porsche. Is it a 911? 

Michelle: No idea.

Keller:  I think it’s a Porsche, from the shape of the hood and the headlights and those vent things. 

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  It's fine.

Michelle: I don't like the shape; it looks like the design for a futuristic car gone wrong. 

Keller: I like the shape of it. It’s good looking. Elegant, but not too ostentatious. Those wheels are ugly though.

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: Money, cause they're not very practical so I'd assume the dude has a different car for driving everyday. 

Michelle: The driver's probably a nerdy, trying-too-hard type.

Keller: Looks like something Bond might drive—is that okay to say? Definitely someone confident bordering on arrogant-ass. He’s got great style and money but he's trying to play it cool.

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $80,000?

Michelle: ?????

Keller: Uh...a lot.

BMW E30 M3

Name this car.

Giselle: BMW. I don't know more than that. 

Michelle: Nein.

Keller: BMW, yup.

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  Ehh. It's boxy and weird. 

Michelle: I like the boxiness, and the teeny multicolored logo in the front.

Keller: It's got a mean robot face which kind of weirds me out, but the wheels are pretty cool.

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: That they're into cars but we don't agree about what's pretty. 

Michelle: The driver's probably an old-school, vintage-loving guy. 

Keller: This is like one of those hand-me-down cars rich East Coast kids get when their dad buys something better.

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $60,000?

Michelle: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Keller: Eh, not as much as the Porsche. But a lot.

Toyota Supra

Name this car.

Giselle: Uhm. No idea.

Michelle: No idea.

Keller: Wait, is this a Mustang? 

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  Bleck. It's pretty ugly and that spoiler is dumb. 

Michelle: Eh, looks too much like a bro-ey, douchey, sports car. Generally not a fan of red cars. Sorry. 

Keller: Eh, not my favorite. I hate that back wing thing. Plus they’re a bitch to get in and out of. 

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: Not someone I'd want to talk to.

Michelle: Whoever owns this car is likely trying to compensate for some underperforming area of their life.

Keller: This also looks like a hand-me-down car for 17 year olds. 

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $15,000?

Michelle: I got nothin'.

Keller: Wow! I have no concept of how much cars are.

Shelby GT350

Name this car.

Giselle: Mustang

Michelle: Corvette? Some kind of classic car.

Keller: Mustang, maybe? Can’t tell. Muscle car?

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  Super classic.

Michelle: I dig the old-fashioned shape, but am not a huge fan of the overbearing blue stripes running through the design.

Keller: Hate those stripes. Fine for a race car but, are we racing?

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: They're probably a douchebag.

Michelle: The driver likes record players, drive-in movies, and wears way too much gel in his hair.

Keller: Looks like something one of the kids in Dazed In Confused was driving. So I'm picturing a freshly retired dad who wanted a nostalgic throwback to the glory days.

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: No clue.

Michelle: Same.

Keller: No idea.

Land Rover Defender

Name this car.

Giselle: Land Rover.

Michelle: Jeep.

Keller: Defender! Easy. 

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  I love it. It makes me want to go camping in Alaska or something.

Michelle: I love this car. It screams adventure, road trips, the outdoors, and fun. I can't imagine it not packed with all my friends, driving down an open highway. I like this green too. 

Keller: I think they’re pretty cool all around.

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: Cool dude who likes to get outdoors. 

Michelle: Likely an active, impulsive type who everyone wants to be friends with. Because who doesn't want to be seen in an off-roader? 

Keller: Everyone loves Defenders, but, it kind of feels like a chick car. Or for a hipster from the Pacific Northwest with a lot of money who's really, really into being a hipster and “camping.”

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $35,000-ish. Ish. If it's vintage, more. I want one so...I know.

Michelle: You should just stop asking me at this point.

Keller: Aren’t they not available to buy in the U.S.? So it’d be vintage, so I have no idea.

Mazda MX-5 Miata

Name this car.

Giselle: Uhhh. No.

Michelle: Don't know.

Keller: Classic convertible...hmmm...

What do you like or not like about it?

Giselle:  It's a convertible. That's cool I guess. 

Michelle: Convertibles are kind of fun—they make driving a leisure activity rather than a means to an end! But, this color. I can't. 

Keller: It’s pretty generic. I’m not mad at it. Shrug. 

What do you think about the guy driving it?

Giselle: He's the slightly classier version of number four.

Michelle: I can see this car being the driver's third, "for-fun" car. IE, he's the kind of guy with money to go around.

Keller: It’s got a bit of a California '90s vibe. Like a 30 year old woman cruising by the water.

How much do you think it's worth?

Giselle: $25,000?

Michelle: Oh! I know this one! Just kidding. C'mon.

Keller: Ehh…probably nothing shocking. 
 

Conclusions

  • I certainly didn't expect my coworkers to successfully ID every car, but neither did I expect them to have trouble with some of the more iconic shapes.
  • What stands out the most is that these cars are hyper-relevant to car guys for some rather nuanced reasons, so if you're just driving down the road, most people won't have a clue what you're in, or why you're driving some 30-year-old California women's convertible.
  • Some of the characterizations are fairly spot on, like the "nerdy, trying-too-hard" Porsche 959 assessment, which seems to fit noted 959 guys like Bill Gates and Jerry Seinfeld to a tee.

Aaron Miller is the Rides editor for Supercompressor, and can be found on Twitter. He finds it funny that 2 of the 3 said the E30 makes you look like you're into vintage cars.

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