Guilty pork pleasures in BK

Being Jewish sounds great -- you get 8 nights of presents, you're good with money -- but you also have to deal with one of the most historically significant struggles in human history: keeping kosher. Taking that out of the equation, Traif, opening later this week.

Outfitting their narrow sleeve with an undulating, slate-topped wooden bar overlooking a homey, red-tiled open kitchen, tan wooden tables that dot the dining room's dark plank floor, walls featuring vine/leaf murals by local artists, and a communal table with matching foliage and a hand-etched city skyline, the couple behind Traif (which means unkosher in Hebrew) wanted their first restaurant to celebrate the husband's Jewish roots, and knew the most appropriate way to do that was with...irony! Those eating unholy and unhealthy can nosh on crispy pork belly w/ red papaya, kiwi, and chile vinaigrette; bacon-wrapped, blue cheese stuffed dates; braised pork cheeks w/ prunes & polenta; and even foie gras plated w/ ham, fried egg, yams, hot sauce, and maple gastrique, like what French soul food would look like if only the French had souls. Seafaring sin, meanwhile, includes baked Maine lobster gratin with creamed spinach; mussels w/ chorizo, white wine, aioli, and a Catalan specialty pasta called fideus; shrimp a la plancha with honeyed-carrots & parsnips; and seared scallops w/ caper-brown butter sauce and risotto made with snap peas, who will refuse to be eaten without a parting yo' mama joke.

Warm weather can be appreciated from a stone-tiled back patio (abutting up against a motley garden of bushes and vines), where you can knock back local brews and vino, plus a full range of cocktails, helping you overcome the most historically significant struggle known to man: sobriety.