2009, the Year in Headlights

Food: Hungry people took to the streets in search of mysterious ancient trade routes, but everything they found was soaked in beer.

Drink: World weary travelers sought out refreshment in secret basement hideaways and rickety old hotels, the only places they could escape from a dystopian future.

Gear: Collectors developed an obsession with accumulating old vinyl and intricately crafted latching mechanisms that nonetheless didn't deter folks from repeatedly scoring on cornholes.

Events: Crowds were enthralled as bird-like Mexican wrestlers engaged with nude literary goddesses, who espoused the patriotic virtues of malt liquor.

Services: Life improved vastly when wise, vigilant sherpas whisked you away to new lands, leading to a redoubled effort to manage your finances as necessitated by your diligent, multi-talented servants.