Making everybody happy at once is tough, but pulling it off is magic -- like when Ice-T convincingly pulls off "Detective Fin Tutuola", while making it obvious to his hardcore fans that he would kill Detective Fin Tutuola. Aiming to pull this off restaurant-style, Fuel Kitchen & Cocktail Lounge
From the Sound-Bar/Zentra/Y/Crescendo guys, Fuel's a cafe-resto-lounge that makes several blurring Clark Kent changes to fulfill the needs of day, night, and late-night people under one impressive roof: a sleek space that's part Euro, part Euro-ized Americana, with floor-to-ceiling windows, twin black-tiled bartops, and six artsy gas pump installations each rocking a flat screen, three red-backlit liquor shelves, and an ornamental nozzle and hose. During daytime cafe hours, there'll be free wi-fi, a jet/hot tub-sounding $10k La Cimbali M2 Turbostream churning out LavAzza coffees, seven different smoothies, and bistro grub like Kobe burgers, 15 thin crust 'zas, fried chicken sliders, and four "hot bruschettas" ("The ham, the ham, the ham is on fire"). While the same grub's available for dinner, the nighttime focus shifts to specialty cocktails (including three mojitos, margs, and...spiked smoothies) and bottled brews from Fat Tire to Hacker-Pschorr; late night's ruled by name-brand DJs pushing "indie electronic dance" through 10 high-end speakers, notably two massive "Bent Horn" subwoofers -- according to Paula Jones, also the "distinguishing characteristic" of Bill Clinton
Next month, Fuel will unveil a massive sidewalk patio wrapping around Division and Hermitage -- putting you that much closer to some dastardly pancho'd man who'll either make you thankful for Tutuola's services, or be Tutuola.