A local watering hole should reflect the neighborhood it calls home, unless everyone's fat, in which case mirrors would just double the gross. For a sports haunt that perfectly fits in South Loop: Jimmy Green's. With an upscale sports-joint-cum-boutique-hotel vibe that continues the hood's trend of classy development, JG's cavernous silver-and-black, florescent lit, sleekly modern digs house a bowel-voiding sound system supporting 22 flat screens and a massive projection screen (hey, it may be South Loop, but it is still Chicago). The Italian-shaded menu has a wide range of bar bites, like an angel hair/basil/asiago/egg "pasta pancake" topped w/ marinara; spicy Sicilian shrimp atop creamy polenta; and fried, grilled, & Buffalo "Three-Way Calamari", for the discerning cephaloperv. More substantial options include DIY pizza with typical toppings punched up by the likes of chorizo, mascarpone, and avocado; burgers topped with anything from fried egg, to roasted garlic, to Boursin; plus signature sandwiches like Cajun tilapia w/ Creole mayo on focaccia, and a meatball sub made with a family recipe, less embarrassing but far more dangerous than hereditary baldness. To wash things down the full bar's got 50-plus beers, with the 16 drafts set to include Bell's Oberon, Three Floyds Alpha King, and Goose Island Green Line, which should remind you that even without mirrors all you need to do is get on the L to double the gross.