Nudie Jeans

Resisting the aging process can have unfortunate consequences, as evidenced by the flimsy charade of your dad's combover, or the botox injections that give him a frightening resemblance to Meg Ryan. Stylishly going with the aging flow, Nudie Jeans

One of the few remaining Swedish imports that doesn't come with a maddening set of assembly instructions, NJ's specialty is masterfully crafted dry denim that's tough and untreated, but given enough quality time hugging your posterior and not being washed, will come to fit you like a glove, assuming you only had two enormous fingers. New styles include the Average Joe Dry Heavy, a straight-legged slim-opening bootcut on 14.25 oz Italian denim with Nudie's signature orange threading, the bleached and scraped Thin Finn Black Weft Indigo, a slim fit model on Italian powerstretch fabric, and the 100% organic Grim Tim Dry Dirt, based on lightweight denim and made with potato starch, just like your third chin. They're also giving some love to your torso with buttondowns like the soft cotton twill, optic-checked Gunnar, the heavier Allan Printed Flannel with custom metal buttons and interior orange neck piping, and the '70s inspired Kenny, made with 100% organic cotton, a front patch pocket on the left and a collar that's pointed, as is the convo with your GF when she asks why you're dressed like Tony Manero.

Not wanting to leave your junk out of the mix, they've also got a variety of undie cuts (Bobby, a mid-brief, Sune, a boxer brief, etc.) in prints like the Inca-inspired Ethnic and the geometry-inspired Circles, also the saggy under-eye skin that led to your confused paternal feelings whenever Harry Met Sally's on cable.