Some classics should never be updated, whether you're talking soda (witness the failure of New Coke) or actors (witness the failure of Charlie Sheen, aka "Old Coke"). Bringing you classic beach stylings: Vintage Red summer wear. VR just put out highly accessible, thoughtfully executed gear that harkens back to the halcyon days of beach lounging -- when the Brazilian was just a foreigner, and Mark Harmon was riding high. The first of its twin collections, Ocean Waves, features shirts made from "whisper weight lawn cotton", notably the short-sleeve button-up "Havana White" (intricately stenciled designs w/ white embroidery on white fabric), the horizontal striped, light blue "Laguna Beach" polo (screams vintage OP) and the long-sleeved "Miami Hurricane" -- inexplicably patterned with Hawaii 5-0 florals as colorful as Steve McGarrett's hair was immovable. To cover your boys, VR's cranking out madras shorts like a blue/gray/white job printed with dozens of palm trees, the earth-toned/checked "Sandy Dune" and a number made up of individual plaid squares known as the "Patchwork" -- or in your case, Patch Fat-ems. VR's second summer collection hits stores in a few weeks: Tribal Island, inspired by the classic theme of being shipwrecked in the South Pacific -- a predicament that defies update, as your only beverage option is Coconut Classic.