True, LA might not have the best pizza. But screw that whiner crap, because now we have the biggest: the World's Biggest Delivery Pizza.
Dreamed up by the tossers at Hollywood's Big Mama's And Papa's, this rectangular behemoth's statistics say it all: 2,916 square inches, chopped into 200+ slices -- enough to feed 50-70 people, or one red-eyed Michael Phelps. Making the 'za takes two "pizza specialists" wrestling with 20lbs of dough, 20lbs of Real California mozzarella, 100 ounces of sauce and, if you go for the most popular topping, 300+ pepperoni slices, all cooked in a gas oven with a custom two-foot extension, making it the Foxy Brown of kitchen equipment. Delivery takes four people and a U-Haul, and can only be made to ground floors with double-doors, so, mansions, schools, warehouses, and the homeless are in luck.
Pizzas can be split into quadrants for toppings, and must be ordered 24-hours in advance -- enough time for you to come to grips with the depressing fact that it is the size of the pie, and not the motion in the oven.