RazzleDazzle Barbershop

No matter how pleasurable, there's something shameful about pampering yourself -- unless you pamper with technology so dated, it could easily turn fatal. Primp like your granddad used to, at RazzleDazzle.

From a woman who owned a 16-Supercuts empire in Fla. and Puerto Rico, RD looks like a pre-suffrage men's parlor (marble-topped Victorian cutting stations, old-timey chandeliers, Tiffany lamps, checkered tile floors), rocks ESPN and The Three Stooges on hi-defs, and hawks old school grooming services performed by a staff dressed in the traditional shirt/vest/armband/hat (casual Fridays = bathing singlets). Facial action includes neck shaves, beard trimming & shaping, and full shaves performed with hot lather, oil, and a straight edge razor (you can get a cheaper electric shave if you're in a hurry/a squirming coward). Other services include hand & foot treatments, haircuts, tea tree oil scalp treatments, shoe shines, and shoulder & neck massages for a buck a minute -- the parking meter increments make sense, since there's the possibility your too-relaxed carcass will have to be towed away.

To regularize things, grab a year VIP membership and get unlimited haircuts & shoe shines, two hot shaves a month, the prerogative to cut in line, and free Scotch or vodka upon arrival -- just step gingerly, because in the barber shoppe of yore, nothing spelled death like drinking and line-cutting.