Game of Thronesisn’t all about dragons, death and destruction in the quest for the Iron Throne—it also features its fair share of drinking and raucous merrymaking. And when it comes to imbibing, no one knows better than everyone’s favorite “drunken little lust-filled beast,” Tyrion Lannister. Tyrion has the sharpest tongue in the Seven Kingdoms, especially when he’s talking about drinking (with one quote in particular reaping HBO more money than all the gold in Casterly Rock). Learn from the smartest man in Westeros with these insightful, wine-fuelled quotes, preferably with a goblet in hand.
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On Non-Negotiable Terms
“I am a person who drinks. People who drink need to keep drinking.”
On Special Skills
“It's not easy being drunk all the time. If it were easy, everyone would do it.”
On Getting Through the Hard Times
“Everything’s better with some wine in the belly.”
Tywin Lannister: “You seem rather drunk.”
Tyrion: “Rather less than I’d like to be. Isn't it a man's duty to be drunk at his own wedding?”
“Drinking and lust: No man can match me in these things. I am the god of tits and wine.”
On Bedtime Rituals
Tyrion: “I can't sleep without wine.”
Jorah Mormont: “Then stay awake.”
On Not Sweating the Small Stuff
“It’s only wine.”
On Retirement Plans
“I'd like to have my own vineyard, make my own wine: The Imp's Delight. Only my close friends could drink it.”
On Wine’s Effectiveness
Missandei: “I have tried wine before. It made me feel funny.” Tyrion: “That’s how you know it’s working.”
On Swapping Stories
“Someday, if you decide not to execute me, I'll tell you all about why I killed my father. And on that day, should it ever come, we'll need more wine than this."
On Infallible Logic
Missandei: “We do not drink.” Tyrion: “Until you do.”