How to Play Slap the Bag
Slapping is never a good course of action. Unless, of course, you’re playing Slap the Bag, which is by far the easiest drinking game you can play. It can be enjoyed whether you’re young or old, athletic or clumsy. As far as drinking games go, it barely slides into the category of “game,” serving more as a way to drink wine among friends, even if they’re not seasoned wine drinkers.
There’s a good chance you’ve already encountered Slap the Bag. While its origin, like nearly all drinking games, is murky, its prevalence is not. It’s so common that even Fox News has written about it. The piece is called “Interesting Use of Boxed Wine: Slap the Bag.” In the story, the writer notes that it’s “the quintessential college wine drinking game, which translates just fine to grown up parties.” Vivino, a popular wine app, even lists Slap the Bag as a way to “rescue a horrible wine party.” So how do you play? It’s just as simple as it sounds.
How to Play Slap the Bag
You’re going to be approached by someone holding an unboxed bag of wine with the spigot facing down. All you have to do squat to the proper height, position your mouth underneath the stopper without touching it with your lips (this part’s important), and let the wine fall into your mouth as you chug. Drink for as long as you wish—just don’t be that person who overindulges. Few mornings are as painful the day after too much cheap wine.
As soon as you’re done drinking, stop the flow to keep any precious bagged wine from being wasted on your body, clothes and floor. Then, with your fingers spread, slap the bag like a piñata. Don’t punch the bag, and by all means don’t clip the bag holder’s hand as you aggressively slap.
And that’s it. The slap, being in the name of the game, is the only requisite action and serves as an exclamation point to the otherwise tasteless act of drinking boxed wine straight from the bag. If you’re really feeling squirrely, you can slap the bag before you drink. Or before and after. In the end, the slapping is just a sideshow, and Slap the Bag is nothing more than a way to dump cheap wine into the receptacle that is your mouth.
Top Bags to Slap
Franzia: The classic Slap the Bag choice. Chablis and Crisp White are good options for people prone to staining light clothing, while Fruity Red Sangria and Sunset Blush are nice, chuggable reds.
Bota Box: A more upscale option for those who like to mix it up a little. Bota Box offers fresher, more vibrant flavors to ignore as you guzzle it down.
Black Box: The brand’s Chardonnay is flavorful without being overpowering. It comes in a tall, elegant box, but you’re just going to throw that out anyway. But it’s still a tasty option for those with a (slightly) larger disposable income and a more discerning palate.