Print off a 3D mini-me

Having something tiny that bears your likeness is totally sweet, unless it's an infant, in which case it doesn't at all, OK!? For avatars you won't have to put through college, check out Sculpteo.

A Paris-based 3D-printing operation just-avail in the US, Sculpt'll create a miniature 3D model of just about any object you submit to 'em -- including yourself -- all via a process that'll take you only a few minutes, thereby saving you 90 of listening to a whining Rick Moranis. Start by uploading front/profile photos, specify the clothes/colors you'd like to be rocking and whether you want a seven or 10cm model, and finally submit any text you'd like printed on the base, because you won't always be there to tell people to stop touching you. Once their software spits out a 3D rendering, you'll receive a link to a final preview before it's sent to the printer, which'll indelibly affix your visage to a figurine made from a proprietary compound material with a texture similar to that of a plaster cast, something you may actually require when the hideousness of a tiny you leaves you completely crushed.

If mini versions of yourself don't cut it, you can access their 3D software online to create designs for everything from keyrings, to something you can keep a condom in, whatever those are for.