You should come over and try some when we open it! We’re saving it for a special occasion, like if someone has twins. It seems too good to waste on, like, a regular one-baby occasion, ya know?
Also, there’s a chance we might trade it for something that’s even harder to find and will only be opened if someone has triplets or gets elected mayor or something.
Find a startup brewery and claim you knew them before anyone else. It’s like bands, but you get to drink them.
But you know what you CAN have right now? Some homebrew! Seriously. Please have some. We tried to make this imperial habanero IPA and, well... just try one and tell us what you think, but also take like 12 more of them. Please. We don’t care what you do with them.
Sorry... yeah, we used too many habaneros. Here’s some milk stout to calm things down. Fine, fine... starting you out on the heavy stuff was a bad move. Have you had any session beers? That’s industry talk for beers that are like the ones you drink now, except, you know... better. Try this gose. It’s like a light beer but salty. Of course that’s a good thing. Haven’t you ever had a michelada? No, not a Michelob. Man, we need to broaden your cocktail and ethnic cuisine horizons too, but that’s a different conversation.