Sometimes you don’t drink a beer as quickly as you’d like. You’re distracted by burgers on the grill that need flipping, the end of the baseball game that needs watching, or the need to enter a pie eating contest at the last moment. Your beer sits there, getting warm. And even if you enjoyed the first few sips ice cold, the rest is a warm mess. The Chillsner looks like an ice-cold nail, and it keeps your bottle of beer cold all the way through. Simply freeze the Chillsner before a party, pop the beer open, and slide the Chillsner in for a consistently cold bottle of booze. Eating your weight in cherry pie shouldn’t stop you from enjoying a cold beer.
Where to buy: Corkcicle
Fruit Drink Floaties
Floaties are there to keep people who don’t know how to swim afloat. You know what also doesn’t know how to swim? Your beer. I mean, it’s possible beers will one day become sentient and swim, but not today. Instead, snag this reusable set of two colorful, tropically-tinged floaties that can hold cans and 16-ounce cups snugly, ensuring they float next to you in the pool.
Where to buy: Cocktail Emporium
Ice Mule Backpack Cooler
Coolers are essential for the beach or camping, as enjoying nature sober is no way to live. But while those coolers are useful, they’re also a real pain in the butt if you want to move around more than 2 feet. That’s why this hella smartly designed backpack weighs only 3.2 pounds and can keep 18 cans plus ice cold for 24 hours straight. Oh, and it’s waterproof, so it can float too! Load it up, go climb a mountain, and have the ability to enjoy 18 brews with your friends when you reach the summit.
Where to buy: Ice Mule Coolers
The Standard 2.0 Bottlekeeper
This is the only product in this rundown that’s so useful that Mark Cuban and Lori Greiner from Shark Tank invested a million bucks in the business. They did so because it’s genius: A bottle that unscrews from the bottom and fits a 12-ounce bottle of beer inside, keeping it ice cold. Bonus: There’s a bottle opener in the cap. But it’s also hella smart because it keeps what’s inside the Bottlekeeper hidden. Does anyone have to know you’re drinking a beer inside something that looks like a water bottle? No. No they do not.
Where to buy: Bottlekeeper
Campfire Beer Caramelizer
Germans know a thing or two about beer. So if they say, “Everyone should shove a hot poker into a strong beer because it’ll make it taste better,” we’d do well to listen. Even though that’s pretty friggin weird. And because hot pokers can be a tad dangerous, there’s this Campfire Beer Caramelizer, a Harry Potter wand-looking thing that caramelizes the sugars in strong beers and makes them smokier and smoother. Use it on the next pastry stout you drink!
Where to buy: Uncommon Goods