This Bloody Mary has a footlong sub, an entire pizza, and your envy

We've seen some pretty insane Bloody Marys in our day, but none with an entire pepperoni pizza. Enter Randy Liedtke, a comedian and podcaster who took it upon himself to create the most monstrous Mary since that one who showed up in your mirror after some precise chanting.

Bloody Mary ingredients
Randy Liedtke

After pondering ingredients like a full rack or ribs and a rotisserie chicken, Liedtke settled on the following ingredients for his boozy beast: a footlong sub, four pieces of fried chicken, a full pepperoni pizza, two double cheeseburgers, another smaller Bloody Mary, onion rings, fries, garlic bread, pickles, olives, an onion, a lemon, a lime, and a jalapeño. The whole thing was so complicated that he even sketched out a blueprint before assembly. Luckily, the engineering was sound, and he ended up with the marvel you see here.

Bloody Mary with pizza, burgers, footlong sub
Randy Liedtke

Since he is not a quitter, Liedtke then began consuming the whole thing from top to bottom, skipping only the garlic bread (because of an allergy) and the lemon, lime, onion, and jalapeño (because gross). His stomach did not thank him, but we will, because we just found our new go-to brunch cocktail.

Kristin Hunt is a food/drink staff writer for Thrillist. She doesn't like Bloody Marys, but she definitely would've helped out with that garlic bread. Follow her at @kristin_hunt.