Check out this very secret North Korean dinner featuring Kim Jong-un!

Because, according to a poll taken in North Korea, North Korean food is the BEST FOOD IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE, upstart N'awlins-based supper club Dinner Lab hosted a NK-themed feast in an Austin, TX warehouse, and were lucky enough to be graced by the presence of Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un himself, who made everyone in Texas feel comfortable by continuously doffing his cowboy hat, changing size, and standing in people's salads.

Chef Jae Jung works for John Besh in New Orleans cooking Italian food, but jumped at the chance to explore her Korean heritage and offer diners a once-in-a-lifetime taste of North Korea, with a little help from a sous chef who earned a Michelin star for the very first meal he ever cooked. And no, it wasn't on an Easy Bake Oven.

Although his father preferred Hennessy, Max malt beer is more the type of drink Young Jong can get behind

Straight from the capital city, this goozoo muchim salad features watercress and cilantro with walnut & sesame vinaigrette

Since North Koreans have no choice but to all LOVE a good parade, here's a formation of three types of kimchi

NoKo food is less spicy than its Southern cousin, matching its colder climate. Here Lil' Kim oversees the production line of a seven-grain rice bowl with duck breast, bean sprouts, Summer squash, rehydrated pyogo mushroom, bok choy, mushroom-cured egg yolk, and Spring onion emulsion

Although dessert is currently as rare in North Korea as a mistake made by the Supreme Leader, the chef cooked up a special treat of hotteok -- a cinnamon-laced, pan-fried pastry with green tea caramel, black pepper creme fraiche, and Korean chili paste paired with cinnamon punch

And perhaps the most important ingredient of a North Korean feast is the company -- here a group of Austin tastemakers are totally rudely texting under the table raising their glasses to the continued prosperity of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea, and its Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un, who would like to point out that he could totally eat much spicier things than his Southern counterparts, but just doesn't want to. And also that he's dating Cindy Crawford.