Hiccups at the bar are like little bodily contractions that show the world you're at least 4x as sloppily intoxicated as you really are -- they are embarrassing, uncomfortable, and give off that not-so-attractive "wino" vibe. Unfortunately, I get Sudden Onset Hiccups (SOHs) whenever I, as the kids would say, get turnt. And the old stalwarts like drinking water through a towel or scaring the shit out of yourself by watching a 2016 presidential debate don't really work.
So I asked a slew of bartenders for their diaphragm-settling tips and tricks, because basically I ask bartenders to help solve all my problems. Though these methods and the ways I approached them were purposely non-scientific, a few of them actually worked (for me, at least).
See! I told my mom I would learn something hanging around all these bars, and now I have.