We know very little about the dining habits of CIA operatives. Are their burritos stuffed with coded messages? Do they eat ramen with poison dart-throwing chopsticks? Are they also getting a Robert Irvine restaurant? We may never know the answers to those questions, but one thing's now clear: they're just as addicted to coffee as the rest of us.
A reporter from The Washington Post (who's probably on some list now) got the scoop on the Starbucks on the CIA's Langley campus, and it's just as secretive as you'd imagine. First off, no names. Not even obviously fake ones like Gandalf or Benedict Cumberbatch -- it makes the CIA customers uncomfortable, so the baristas did away with names altogether. Given these concerns, rewards cards are also a no-go, and baristas definitely can't snap selfies with Valerie Plame, since they have to leave their phones locked in their cars.