The Old Spice Guy, known as Isaiah Mustafa when he's not frolicking around shirtless shilling deodorant, is BACK… in Israel. This time, he's fully clothed (in a suit AND tie) and extolling the virtues of Maccabee beer, a big-name brew brand that's basically the Israeli equivalent of Coors, according to those in the know at Thrillist HQ. As part of Maccabee's "Tasty, Tasty" campaign meant to promote the beer's new flavor, Mustafa uses his all-knowing presidential voice to tell one persnickety bar patron, "You don't know what taste is." What is taste then, exactly? President Old Spice expounds...:
"Have you ever tasted a snowflake that's fallen on your sweetheart's nose?"
"Did you ever taste the silent splendor of the sunrise… from space?"
"Have you ever tasted the triumph of baking a souflee and pulling it out of the oven just seconds before it collapses?"
"Have you ever tasted the victorious weight of gold around your neck?"
"Have you tasted a brownie in Amsterdam?"
"What does 'taste' taste like? When a free people chooses freedom, the taste of that choice is the flavor of justice. Because there's nothing "free" about the justice of taste."
"What does 'x' over the square root of 31 taste like? You don't know. Because you don't know what taste is."
Have you tried the new Maccabee beer? Does it taste like the splendor of sunrise, or like a faintly Middle-Eastern Miller High Life that's been left in your friend's trunk overnight and then re-refrigerated even though that's kind of gross? Tell us!!