Looks like The Lurker is no longer the worst person in the bar. That honor now goes to Dr. Tony Moss, owner of a new "pub" in London that isn't a pub at all -- it's actually a massive psych experiment where you might get served booze-less beer, a bunch of future shrinks are constantly watching you on hidden cameras, and they won't even play "Fat Bottomed Girls" on the jukebox.
For now simply dubbed Room J-407, this elaborate trap resides on the fourth floor of London South Bank University's main block. The lab/bar was built by Moss's psychology department for £20,000 ($33,392) -- thanks for your year's tuition, random freshman! -- in order to monitor the effects of alcohol on behavior. It may have appropriate lighting, music, and even creepy pre-recorded background chatter, but if you order a brew, you could get served a placebo that just smells like the real deal. Other cruel experiments include a slot machine to measure risk-taking behavior and a wire loop game to test hand-eye coordination. They're working on getting a jukebox next to determine which music makes people drink more quickly. Save your money, Moss, and just play the damn Queen song already.
Kristin Hunt is a food/drink staff writer for Thrillist. Some of her strongest friendships are built on cheeseburgers. Follow her at @kristin_hunt.