Ever since we humans developed intelligent thought, we've been looking for substances to make us more stupid. And while the US has a long and storied history of secretly distilling blindingly strong liquor, we're not alone -- these 22 other countries all have illustrious traditions of making alcohol in containers even dirtier than bathtubs. Here are the details on the most interesting homemade alcohols from around the world, ranging from Trinidad's "mountain dew" to Iran's "alcohol dog".
Country of Origin: Canada
Fun Fact: Legend has it that this rum-esque booze got its name after a first-time drinker screamed at the taste. Whether that drinker was actually Dustin Diamond has yet to be determined by forensic pathologists.
Country of Origin: Trinidad and Tobago
Ingredients: Sugarcane, molasses, and citrus wines
Fun Fact: Also known as "mountain dew". Really. Though you can imagine their version of "mountain dew, code red" means something slightly different.
Name: Maria-louca (Crazy-Mary)
Country of Origin: Brazil
Ingredients: Sugar, uncooked rice, yeast, and whatever fruit you can steal from the prison cafeteria
Fun Fact: Mostly cooked by inmates, this concoction can earn you 30 days in solitary according to this Vice investigation, but it's apparently really delicious.
Country of Origin: Guatemala
Ingredients: Corn and fruit
Fun Fact: Shamans value it for its cleansing powers and spit it on people who need to be healed. Who subsequently need to be re-cleansed with a shower.
Country of Origin: Puerto Rico
Ingredients: Sugarcane, grapes, prunes, raisins, dates, mango, grapefruit, coconut and pineapple
Fun Fact: Pitorro can be either white wine or rum, and is often buried in the ground to cure with either fruit or savory additives like cheese or rare meat, giving it a very rare taste.