I love beer, and I love the Internet, but wherever the two intersect -- be it on reddit, BeerAdvocate, or some backwater brew message board -- you're sure to find mouthy pedants who pound keyboards, put down pilsners, and generally give a bad name to the glorious pursuit of drinking beer. Worse than his snobbery, though, is the Internet beer geek's insistent quest for "the next big thing": that new-new brew, the stuff no one's drinking yet.
For a solid few years, sour beer has been a growing fixation amongst early-adopting, post-hipster Cicerone types here in the US. Obviously, this sort of Emperor's New Clothes beer-fetishism is insufferable, and I've intentionally avoided the category like the plague. But ever since you suds-soused losers freaked out at my hatred for IPAs, my editor has been trying to get me to take down sour beers similarly, and I've finally relented.
For more on why sour beers suck, I emailed a DC consultant named Thomas Haydon, a beer geek and occasional trader (more on that in a second). He loves sour beers, so I lied and told him I was writing a piece about how terrific they were. Screw journalism ethics -- this is a diatribe, kids. (Disclosure: Thomas is a friend of a friend, and we've drunk together a dozen times before so it's cool I sorta played him. I think? Sorry Thomas.)
And now, without further ado, here are all the reasons sour beers suck: