There Is No Secret Starbucks Menu, Dummies

Pumpkin Spice Latte With Ice Cream
Drew Swantak/Thrillist
Drew Swantak/Thrillist

You probably are clued in on the big Venti secret: Starbucks has an underground menu! With hidden drinks only a select few can access like some kind of exclusive club. How fun!

Well guess what, you and all your little friends are totally wrong. It's OK -- all of mankind used to think the world was flat, and that Ruben Studdard was going to be a mega-star. People make mistakes.

On a recent Reddit round-up, an eager customer tried to suss out Starbucks baristas' opinions on the so-called "secret-menu." 

What she got was a complete denouncement of the menu itself. It doesn't exist. It never did. You just took a heavily caffeinated red pill, and you probably won't like what you see on the other side. 

So, it would seem the "secret menu" isn't some clandestine (but probably laminated) sheet underneath the table, but just an overall readiness to make custom orders.

The menu itself is just fan-made creations that don't suck. Which... almost makes it better?

Overall, the general consensus of the digital baristas implies that though making these items is generally annoying (as it's more work), the real annoyance occurs when you simply assume that every Starbucks employee in the world has access to this uniform "secret menu," which is obviously not the case.  

This user, aptly named "what-size" sums it up succinctly. 

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Wil Fulton is a staff writer for Thrillist. He's never once peed on a busboy, but once he threw up on a horse. Follow him: @wilfulton.