Most DJs at bars don't mind a compliment or some quick small talk, but odds are that when someone approaches the DJ booth, they're planning to unleash a self-centered demand that has something to do with Katy Perry. Here are the 14 things DJs most hate to hear (other than Katy Perry).
Know Your Red Wines 101 Cheat Sheet Flickr/David Chau “Do you have an iPhone 5 charger?”
Contrary to popular belief, a DJ booth is not an Apple Store that stocks a full inventory of vintage charging cables.
“Can I get on the mic and make a general fool of myself?”
“Can I put my drink down next to all your expensive equipment?”
Sure, I'd love vodka spilled all over my mixer.
“Can I put my purse back here?”
No, someone will probably spill vodka on it.
“No one is dancing.”
Thanks for the update!
“I want to dance. Why is no one dancing?”
You don't need personal permission from the DJ to dance. There's a million reasons why people might not be dancing, but that isn't one of them.
“Can you play Katy Perry/Justin Bieber?”
I could. But no.
Dan Gentile/Thrillist “I'm about to leave, can you play Katy Perry/Justin Bieber?”
“Can you play this Katy Perry/Justin Bieber remix from my phone?”
No, with a side of definitely not.
“Can you play this song I've forgotten? Let me hum it to you!”
Shazam doesn't recognize your off-key humming and DJs probably don't either.
“Can you play a different genre of music than what you're playing?”
Sure can. Sure won't.
"Can I pretend I'm DJing while my friend takes a photo?"
“Do you know where I can find illegal things?”
Probably. Will we tell you? No.
“How much are you getting paid for this gig?”
Not enough! How much money do you make at your job?
is a staff writer on Thrillist's National Food and Drink team. He has been an underpaid DJ for over 10 years. Follow him to overpriced vinyl records at Dan Gentile @Dannosphere.