This is the universe telling you that you are either way too young, or way too old, to be out this late.
Make out for more than two minutes at a time
Get a room. Or least a sizable dumpster to squat behind. Or a dark alley. Or put a coat over your heads. I don't know.
Get an erection
Again, at least go find a dumpster, alley, or coat. Or a bathroom. For four minutes.
Order fancy cocktails at a dive bar
If the bar you walk into has sawdust on the floor, a special on PBR pitchers, and Rob Alexson puking on chairs, it's not the place to order a bougie-ass cocktail. Your bartender will have to look it up. It will probably be gross as hell, and it's likely they haven't used that bottle of Chartreuse since the Reagan administration. As Liam Neeson said in Batman Begins (and probably some other movies, too), "Always mind your surroundings."