Lining up at the bar
This is a relatively new epidemic that, like bacon donuts, has roots in the Pacific Northwest. People will walk into a pub, look at a 30-foot-long mahogany bar lined with empty stools, then form a single-file line to get a drink as if they’re waiting for churros at Disneyland. People seem to believe they’re being polite. What they’re instead doing is making it impossible for a bartender to multitask, hit a few orders at the same time, and take care of people who were sensible enough to sit at the bar like a goddamn grownup. If you see this happening at a place that specifically lacks a sign that says “line up here,” just sit at the bar, order a drink, and watch everyone else wait far longer than any human should for a drink. Then tip your bartender generously for serving them with a smile rather than zapping them with a cattle prod like they deserve.