Food & Drink

What Your Favorite Shot Says About You

Published On 12/28/2016 Published On 12/28/2016
illustrated shots
Daniel Fishel/Thrillist

"C'mon, take a shot!": It's a common phrase said both at a bar and a basketball game -- though it's only recommended you take 20 of them when you're on the court. At a bar, however, the type of shot you take is important, no matter how many of them you take. It says a lot about you, in fact. That's why we've rounded up 14 popular shots, and determined what it really means if you drink them. (Now would probably be a good time to take a shot.)

Daniel Fishel/Thrillist

Alabama Slammer

1/2oz amaretto, 1/2oz peach liqueur, 1/2oz sloe gin, splash of OJ + sweet-and-sour mix
You were born in Milwaukee, but you've always felt a little country. You love Tim McGraw. You own a collection of cowboy hats, but you're too embarrassed to wear them. You wish your city had a Chick-fil-A, despite never having eaten there. You don't follow college football, but nevertheless get a tiny buzz when you hear 'Bama won a big bowl game. You've never been to the South, but this shot feels like home.

Mind Eraser

1oz vodka, 1oz Kahlua, 1oz soda water
"Bro, dead ass, you have to get this shot. Bro, get me a straw. You get layers, bro. Layers on layers on layers when you suck this shit up. You get a sick head rush, and like, different flavors and shit. I'm getting everyone shots, you down?" That's you.

Jolly Rancher

1/3oz Sour Apple Pucker, 1/3oz peach schnapps, 1/3oz cranberry juice
You eat frozen Snickers nightly as a midnight snack, and yet you've never had a cavity. Dentists hate you! You don't have a sweet tooth, you have sweet teeth. You stir your coffee in the morning with Pixy Stix. When you wake up, you crack open your first of five sodas for the day (who needs coffee?). Your friends joke that if you keep eating like this, you're going to get diabetes, but joke's on them because you've already had it for a while now.

Blow Job

1oz Kahlua, 1oz Green Chartreuse, 1oz vodka
Growing up, you wore those Big Johnson T-shirts. You had every Big Johnson shirt possible. The double meaning of the phrase "Big Johnson" delighted you to no end. That's just your wacky sense of humor! When you order this shot, you say, "I want a blow job!" as loudly as possible to the bartender, to the dismay of anyone within earshot. You have no idea what's in the shot, you just love the name. Your closest friends make fun of you behind your back.

Kamikaze

2oz vodka, 1/2oz orange liqueur, dash of lime juice
You've done hours of research on the kamikaze pilots of the second World War. You've delved into the psyches of those men to understand what caused them to make the ultimate sacrifice. Your favorite film is the Smithsonian's harrowing Day of the Kamikaze. Just kidding, you just love the way orange booze and vodka taste together!

Daniel Fishel/Thrillist

Redheaded Slut

1oz cranberry juice, 1/2oz peach schnapps, 3/4oz J├Ągermeister
Your friends will not do J├Ąger shots with you anymore. It's not that they don't like it, but you're just so goddamn into it. It's all you talk about when you get to the bar. "Let's do J├Ąger shots!" you'll say. Repeatedly. You're always trying to get people to go to that one bar with the frozen J├Ąger machine. No one ever wants to go. But Redheaded Sluts? Everyone will down one of those no problem. No one has to know J├Ąger is in it. That's your little secret.

Three Wise Men

1oz Johnnie Walker, 1oz Jim Beam, 1oz Jack Daniel's
It's like clockwork. You are seated in your chair at the end of the bar in this crappy little dive at 5:02pm, Monday through Friday. Yeah, the carpet smells like death and the people are horrible, but the shots are $2 if you order them before 6, and you are always there before 6. This shot temporarily makes you forget about all the bullshit that transpired in your day for the previous eight hours. You have no other plans for the night. Who needs real friends, anyways, when you've got Johnnie, Jim, and Jack?

B-52

1oz Kahlua, 1oz Baileys, 1oz Grand Marnier, served on fire
What the hell is with shots and depressing war references? Actually, you've never once wondered that. You don't even know the name of this shot, you just ask the bartender for a shot that's on fire. And yeah, you're a little scared of taking down a flaming shot, but it attracts attention when you're about to put it to your lips. Maybe that person you've been glancing at all night will notice you now. Yep, they're definitely looking... probably because your beard is on fire.

Tequila Shot

Umm, we're gonna say a few ounces of tequila? And a wedge of lime plus some salt.
If the tequila is cheap: You want to go where the night takes you, and you do not care if you end up in jail at the end of it. You end up in jail at the end of most nights out.

If the tequila is not cheap: You make sure that everyone around you hears the name of the very expensive tequila brand you just ordered for you and your friends. You hate the taste, but it's a good look. That also explains the fancy-looking watch you insist on wearing, which definitely isn't a real Rolex. But who's gonna ever look that close? You say the name of the tequila you ordered again, just in case people didn't hear the first time.

Buttery Nipple

1oz Buttershots, 1/2oz Irish cream
You're a monster of a human being. OK, not in the "you were once a strong-arm dictator of a country" sort of way, but in other, even more insidious ways. You never tip in bars or restaurants. You've never met a situation you couldn't scream "woohoo" in. You wear white after Labor DayÔÇŽ to funerals. In college, your roommate got flowers from that guy she just started dating, but you said they came for you and you never once felt bad about it. So yeah, you're the kind of person who enjoys Buttershots and Irish cream mixed together.

Daniel Fishel/Thrillist

Any Well Shot

1 1/2oz of the cheap stuff
You do all your shopping at Costco, because when you buy in bulk you save money, and the stuff there is just as good as anywhere else. Also, the samples. You love free samples! If you could survive on samples, you would do it, silently roaming the warehouse floor eating bite-sized sausages cooked in front of you by an uninterested employee. This is the drink equivalent of the free sample -- you just throw down whatever garbage booze the bartender feels like pouring you.

Jell-O Shot

Jell-O, vodka, any flavor of Pucker
There was that one spring break in Cancun your junior year, and you and all your friends went. You wanted to stay inside that Se├▒or Frog's forever. The foam! The lights! The clouds of body spray! The drinking! You'd had Jell-O shots before, but they never tasted as good as they did that one night. Now you make them for your house parties, in a failed attempt to recapture that Se├▒or Frog's magic. But you're kidding yourself -- you're too old for magic. You have a real job and a retirement account now, buddy. But you have to admit that cherry Jell-O shot still tastes pretty good.

Lemon Drop

1/2oz vodka, 1/2oz lemon juice, 1/2oz triple sec
You wear a lot of Lilly Pulitzer. If you don't know what that is, you probably didn't grow up in Connecticut country clubs, pledge Kappa, or let mommy and daddy bankroll your entire existence. You don't walk, you float, thanks to daily barre classes. You work in marketing. You're good at your job, Alison with one "l." You're real good at your job.

Motor Oil

1oz J├Ągermeister, 1/2oz peppermint schnapps, 1/2oz Goldschlager, 1/2oz coconut rum
You waited until your senior year to declare a major for college. You were undecided in the last presidential election until you walked into the booth. If your dating life were televised, it'd be The Bachelor -- you're always dating a bunch of people at the same time. It's tough to figure out who you like, after all. This drink satisfies you. It's all the booze you want in a single shot. For a second, you feel like you never have to decide anything ever again.

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Lee Breslouer is a senior writer for Thrillist, and never met a shot he didn't turn down. Follow him to tequila @LeeBreslouer.

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