Whether it's lunch, brunch, or diner, if you're going out to eat, you should always go beyond "bottled or tap?" and order a drink (and we don't mean an iced tea). From an effective missile weapon to a source of snappy lines, whatever boozy concoction you're having is going to take your meal to the next level. Here's how.

 Jeremy Nguyen

1. Some drinks come with even more food! Olives, slices of orange, those weird little onions?

2. If you’re splitting the bill, and your buddy doesn’t order a drink, they have to pick up part of the cost. If they ask for $2 or whatever they’re a bad friend. DOUBLE WIN.

3. You can order a whole class of drinks during the day that would make you look like a crazy person any later (who orders a Screwdriver at night?).

4. Having a glass at lunch is a way easier method of getting some health benefits  at work than buying a stupid standing desk.

5. You went so far as to order a steak. Are you really going to sully that cow’s memory with a soda? Those two things start with “s” and that’s about all they should ever have in common.

6. Ordering food with a ton of substitutions/stipulations is obnoxious. But somehow, doing the same with cocktails, especially off-menu, will make you seem sophisticated and urbane.

7. Throwing water in your bad Tinder date's face... well, it just doesn't have quite the same sting.

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Need even more incentive to order that drink? TGI Fridays' $12 Dine & Drink deal makes it basically an imperative, so go ahead and pair that sirloin with a Cab.
 

 Jeremy Nguyen

8. You never know when you'll finally overestimate your hot sauce handling abilities. Water doesn’t work, so something stronger is worth a shot (this is not based in scientific fact, or even scientific speculation).

9. Because the type of drink you order can be seen as a liquidy extension of your personality, to be used to send a message to be used to friends/business associates/blind dates at your table.

10. Because you are so much more attractive when you drink… but not so much when you eat.

11. Waving a bottle around is a better way to articulate a point than using a fork. And communication is 55% body language so… go strong.

12. Because when you’re done with the first drink, when the server comes by, you get to say “I’m going to take another lap” to order another one.

13. Water doesn’t come with a little umbrella.

14. Something great could happen at any moment, and you might need to toast it. Alternatively, something bad might happen and you may just need to make a dramatic exit. Neither works with fries.

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