- Miramar keeps bringing up going to a strip club like it's the best idea in the world, and it'll be so much fun, and why doesn't anyone want to go to a strip club right now?
- Mission Valley keeps trying to talk to Fashion Valley, which is silently judging Mission Valley’s shoes and refusing to give up its phone number.
- Point Loma wants to go swim in the ocean, even though it's cold and everyone is a little nervous about sharks.
- You see the Gaslamp on the ground, surrounded by paramedics. You think it's unconscious, but then it rears up and starts punching some guy in the face because he looked at the girl the Gaslamp was with. “WERE YOU LOOKING AT MY GIRLFRIEND,” the Gaslamp inquires while punching, only to hear her say that she's not his girlfriend.
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San Diego writer and comedian Matt Louv would absolutely hang out in the bar described above. Follow him: @MattLouv.