Possibly because Willy Wonka's one is guarded by terrifying, orange-faced, green-haired midgets who sing about eating candy in moderation, the dudes at Drink Craft Beer have orchestrated a clever takeover of the Taza Chocolate factory instead, where for a mere $5 donation to charity, they'll hook you up with four local craft brews paired with just the right Mexicano chocolate, plus access to all the chocolate bacon grilled cheese sammies you can take down
While stuffing your pockets full of handfuls of chocolate cubes, turn people's attention away by commenting on the river of chocolate and expensive-looking machinery visible through the factory window
Wash down said cubes with one of several suds including Slumbrew's My Better Half, Narragansett Bock, or Backlash's new "single hop single malt Belgian-style tripel ale" Famine
Just remember that dark chocolate is rich in antioxidants, and has a low glycemic index similar to oatmeal, and will make you live forever and buy you ponies and stuff.
Now that your heart is healthy and you've got all these ponies, why don't you sample another beer like the Ipswich Ale Rye Porter
And now that you've knocked out dessert, it's time for dinner. So ignore the warnings of those ominous singing small people, and tackle this chocolate covered bacon sandwich from Roxy's featuring goat cheese, walnuts, and Taza's spicy Guajillo Chili chocolate.