Because it currently feels like a flock of angry seagulls laid a batch of eggs in your brain, treat yourself to Chicago's 29 finest post-NYE hangover foods. Orrrrrr just stare at these photos lustily while you wait for your microwave to inform you that your Hot Pocket is ready.
Enjoy Baklava for Breakfast Mike Gebert
Ukrainian Village What you're getting: Double Fatso Nothing says "Happy New Year" like a Double Fatso with cheese. Or something. Mike Gebert
Uptown What you're getting: Pho Viet Nam It's like aspirin, but in bowl form. Titus Ruscitti
Ukrainian Village What you're getting: Saudero taco You could do worse than a Suadero taco. But could you do... better? Amber Davis and Elaine Lopez
Lakeview What you're getting: Sip 'n Slider The Sip ‘n Slider is just ridiculous. In a good, slider-y kind of way. Mike Gebert
Lincoln Park What you're getting: Brunch Dog Behold: the glorious Brunch Dog. Thou shalt have no other Brunch Dogs before it. Mike Gebert
Albany Park What you're getting: Italian beef You need this Italian beef. Yes, you do. Sean Cooley
Lincoln Park What you're getting: Maple Bacon Long John The Maple Bacon Long John is here to keep you company this new year. Don't fight it. flickr/pzavit
Lincoln Park What you're getting: Pan pizza Pan pizza from Pequod's? Whoa dude. river roast
River North What you're getting: Biscuits and gravy The Mother's milk of hangover cures. polak eatery
Humboldt Park What you're getting: Two-cheddar pierogi Have you had the two-cheddar one before? Because if you haven't, you really should. Parson's Chicken & Fish
Humboldt Park What you're getting: Huevos rancheros Have a few Negroni slushies outdoors. Then come in for huevos rancheros. cassava chicago
Lakeview What you're getting: Beef and cheddar empanada Did someone say beef and cheddar empanada? Yes, we think they did. drew swantak
At home! What you're getting: Bacon Mac 'N' Cheese Quesadilla Okay, so this one is kind of cheating since you have to make it yourself, but dude, make it yourself. cheesie's pub & grub
Lakeview What you're getting: Grilled cheese If all grilled cheeses were Chicago-style grilled cheeses, the world would be a better (or at least a more Chicago) place. chicago's home of chicken & waffles
Bronzeville What you're getting: Betty Lou You will order the Betty Lou. And it will make your day. mike gebert
Ukrainian Village What you're getting: Two eggs breakfast Stick with what works. mike gebert
Chinatown What you're getting: Shio turkey ramen It's one of the finest bowls of ramen in the city. And no, it doesn't come in package form. sean cooley
Lakeview What you're getting: Roasted Hatch green chile burger Because no hangover food is complete without an egg. sean cooley
River North What you're getting: The Sweet Heat Wait. Is that a chicken sandwich... between two donuts???????? Titus ruscitti
Bucktown What you're getting: Gyro sandwich Bonus: you won't need to eat for days after finishing this. Titus ruscitti
South Deering What you're getting: Fried shrimp How many fried shrimp can you eat the day after going hard on NYE? Only one way to find out. park tavern
Near West Side What you're getting: Animal Tots Meet the new breakfast of champions. Spritz burger
Lakeview What you're getting: Poutine burger Yes, it exists. Oh yes, it most certainly exists. sean cooley
West Loop What you're getting: Bacon Bomb Sometimes a plate of bacon will not do. Sometimes you need 2lbs of ground beef, 2lbs of ground pork, SIXTEEN slices of thick-cut bacon, two eggs, and a blend of spices. This might be one of those times. sean cooley
Logan Square What you're getting: Grilled Thüringer Duh. old town social
Old Town What you're getting: Mac & cheese You can't go wrong with a nice plate of mac & cheese. Especially this mac & cheese. wafel
Loop What you're getting: Caprese and egg Aka, the waffle taco. the smoke daddy
Wicker Park What you're getting: Pulled meat nachos How good does a plate of this sound about now? Pretty damn good, that's how. GT Fish & Oyster
River North What you're getting: Oyster po' boy sliders The ultimate in hangover food art. That you can also eat.
Sign up here for our daily Chicago email and be the first to get all the food/drink/fun in town.
Jay Gentile is Thrillist’s Chicago Editor and tells people he could totally be in the college football playoffs, but would rather watch it on TV.