San Francisco

Sushi made with... oh God...

Everyone loves a good mystery, unless you're a socially inept loser, in which case a below average Mystery that teaches you super creepy pick-up moves will do just fine. For a new resto adding some mystery (meat) to your sushi, hit Flying Ninja.

The first of Hawaii's Ninja Sushi restaurants to hit SF, FN's a raw fish 'n rice-serving brick-walled, terracotta-floored, L-shaped nook that'd otherwise only attract hotel guests and sushi-starved Russian Hillians, if not for the fact that they serve a potential-eighth-wonder-of-the-world: SPAM sushi roll, a go-to snack in Hawaii, but to be fair, they weren't even a state 'til like 1987. And because this delicacy alone isn't enough, the one-piece mystery meat's actually deep fried, then placed on a flattened fist-sized snowball of white rice, with teriyaki sauce and a single belt of seaweed tying everything up, which Marv Albert would totally dig if he wasn't the one biting it. Of course, there're also more typical rolls (like Tiger, Scallop Dynamite, Crunch), plus their signature Super (chopped spicy tuna and cucumber topped with more raw tuna), and an assortment of bowls, salads, and party sets that include a Samurai Combo of 42, because if seven samurai is a classic, combining six of them must be like, super classic.

And if you want a little extra, hit the Kid's Menu where the SPAM combo will get you six cucumber rolls along with said SPAM, but not the kind where Mystery teaches you "peacocking" all up in your inbox.

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