Food & Drink

10 Colossal London Meals You’ll Never Finish

Published On 05/13/2015 Published On 05/13/2015
Courtesy of Wonder Cafe

Summer is beginning to tentatively show itself, and we'll all soon be showing a little more of ourselves too -- so naturally, we thought this would be the perfect time to ask the question: where can you find the capital's fattest, most belly-bursting meals? Well, for starters (and mains, and desserts, and sides), try these spots...

The Wonder Cafe Challenge

Wonder Cafe (address and info)
Hillingdon
This charming, old-school caff has been quietly serving the quaint area of Hillingdon since 1976, but don’t let its reserved history fool you. It officially threw down the breakfast gauntlet with its full English Challenge. It features four fried slices, four slices of toast, four eggs, six sausages, six rashers of bacon, six hash browns, four black pudding, plum tomatoes, mushrooms, and a whole bowl of beans, to be consumed in under 45 minutes. Only one person (competitive eater, Emma Dalton) has ever seen the empty plate of victory.

Courtesy of Big Easy

Limitless Daily Specials

Big Easy (address and info)
Covent Garden & Kings Road
Over in ‘Murica, they do things big. So it’s no surprise that Southern-style Big Easy likes to keep things authentically massive. On Mondays, Tuesdays, and Wednesdays, find yourself up to the ears in unlimited porky goodness, shrimp, or its massive Hog Roast, plus all kinds of sides. Get stuck in for the long haul; if you’re still eating, they just keep bringing you more.

The County Arms

2ft Sausage Roll Challenge

The County Arms (address and info)
Wandsworth
They say size doesn’t matter, but we all know they weren't talking about sausage rolls. The County Arms has one measuring out at a glorious two full feet of flaky, golden crust with juicy spiced meat inside. Sure you could wimp out and only get a portion of the beast, but then you wouldn't be able to look another sausage roll in the eye again.

Gillray's Steakhouse & Bar

'Bull's Head' 1kg steak

Gillray’s (address and info)
Waterloo
This 1-kilo slab of top-shelf steak is grilled to order and smugly waiting for you to try and eat it. It takes no prisoners and boasts less then a 10% finish rate. In fact, only around 60 people have even had the stones to try.

Courtesy of Ping Pong Dim Sum

Lazy Sumdays

Ping Pong Dim Sum (address and info)
Various locations
On Sundays, the PP crew realises that your brain might be preoccupied with headaches and such, and dealing with a vast dim sum menu could be too much of a task. With the Lazy Sumdays menu, you can keep ordering until you work your way through the entire menu. And then start at the beginning again.

Thrillist

Dino Ribs

The Blues Kitchen (address and info)
Camden & Shoreditch
These cartoonishly large Flintstones-style ribs  are only available on Monday evening, and must be pre-ordered. They weight 5/6kg each, and if you can finish one unaided, you'll get it free, plus a T-shirt, and a serious case of the meat sweats.

MEATliquor

Triple Chili Challenge

MEATliquor (address and info)
Various locations
This famed challenge has been wowing London since the dawn of the house of meat & booze. The game is to polish off the whole trinity of a dog, burger, and fries, each loaded with chilli cheese, and each of which is a whole meal unto itself. Do it under 10 minutes and get it for free -- but you may want to train first. The fastest time is currently a lightning-fast 2:47, so good luck. 
 

The Empire State Challenge Burger

Tinseltown (address and info)
Various locations
20oz of meat stacked four patties high with four slices of cheese, onion, lettuce, tomato, and of course, two sides for extra measure. Not enough for you? Upgrade to The Towering Inferno Challenge Burger and load it up with jalapeños.

Frankie's Sports Bar & Diner

All you can eat BBQ

Frankie's Sports Bar & Diner (address and info)
Fulham
You'll never finish this meal because it almost literally never ends -- the food just keeps on coming with unlimited hot wings, pulled pork, ribs, fries, and grilled corn until you either tap out or pass out.

Flickr/John Adkins

The Beast Challenge

Blacks Burgers (address and info)
Croydon
This vast burger is officially Europe's largest, weighing in at 7lbs of beef, nine bacon rashers, nine slices of cheese, a whole head of lettuce, and seven whole tomatoes triple-layered between a bun larger than your head, plus a pound's worth of skinny fries and a full-sized milkshake. Polish it off and land yourself on the sparsely populated Wall of Fame, but crash & burn and find yourself immortalized on the crowded wall of shame. These guys wanted to make sure only the most serious of eaters got involved, so this monster has to be booked and paid for 48 hours in advance.

Sign up here for our daily London email and be the first to get all the food/drink/fun in the city.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
1. Wonder Cafe Long Lane, Hillingdon, UB10

This charming old-school caff has been quietly serving the quaint area of Hillingdon since 1976. It's especially popular during breakfast time, and if you're REALLY hungry, try to battle Wonder Cafe Challenge, which consists of four fried slices, four slices of toast, four eggs, six sausages, six rashers of bacon, six hash browns, six black puddings, plum tomatoes, mushrooms, and a whole bowl of beans, to be consumed in under 45 minutes.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
2. Big Easy 12 Maiden Ln, Covent Garden, WC2E 7NA (Covent Garden)

These guys boast some of the craziest limitless menus in town, and they really aren't kidding. Monday-Wednesday they have daily specials from which, if you can keep eating, they’ll keep bringing more. And just so you know what you're getting into, The Big Pig Gig (Mondays) has ribs, chopped pork, chicken, slaw, beans, hush puppies, fries, and a jug of beer.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
3. The County Arms 345 Trinity Rd, London, SW18 3SH (Wandsworth)

The County Arms sure is an impressive establishment, serving up a menu focusing on fresh British seasonal produce and a variety of beers in a spacious Victorian building.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
4. The Blues Kitchen 111-113 Camden High St, London, NW1 7JN (Camden)

The Blues Kitchen, located in London's Camden neighborhood, serves a combination of classic stateside comfort food with an excellent selection of sides: regional brew, bourbon, wine, and bubbly. Rib Mondays also ensures that you'll be crawling home, happy.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
5. Frankie's Sports Bar & Diner Stamford Bridge, Fulham, SW6 1HS (Fulham)

Frankie's is an American-style sports bar that features 10 big screens, a host of beer options, and delicious eats like burgers, wings, ribs, and more.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
6. Gillray's London County Hall, London, SE1 7PB (South Bank)

On the part of the Southbank overlooking Parliament, Gillray's is the sort of place that will nonetheless give you red if you ask for blue: a steakhouse housed in a curved space whose plush, Art Deco-y vibe is reminiscent of a gentlemen's club... from back in the days when that unfortunately meant just what it sounded like.

Previous Venue Next Venue Venue Description
7. Blacks Burgers 920 Brighton Rd, Purley, CR8 2LN

Blacks' concept is simple: good burgers with all the fixins. It bakes its buns and mixes its meat and sources fresh ingredients. And if you're feeling VERY hungry, try The Beast burger challenge, which consists of Europe's largest burger, weighing in at 7lbs of beef, nine bacon rashers, nine slices of cheese, a whole head of lettuce, and seven whole tomatoes, triple layered between a bun larger than your head, plus a pound's worth of skinny fries and a full-sized milkshake.

Clickbait