The 16 Worst Restaurant Decisions You Can Make in London

No one ever makes good decisions on an empty stomach, which explains a lot about Jessica Simpson (zing!), and why poor restaurant decisions are so tragically familiar. Arming you with the knowledge to avoid these fates, here are the worst restaurant decisions in London...

1. Eating at Pizza Express on Dean St when Pizza Pilgrims is across the street

Unless you’re in the mood for live jazz. In that case, go ahead; we kind of almost understand. 

2. Filling up on bread at 8 Hoxton Square

Yes, it's bacon bread, and yes, it is pretty spectacular. But keep your eyes on the prize here, because its real food is amazing. 

3. Forgetting the cocktails at Hawksmoor 

Go for wine with your steak, sure, but these are some of the best mixeds in the city. 

4. Eating curry on Brick Lane

There’s just so much better elsewhere. If you think you have to (why??), at least do yourself a favour and check out our Brick Lane guide first.

5. Going to any Angus Steakhouse ever

How are they still open?!? If you really need a steak around Piccadilly, head to Hawksmoor Air Street, or if you need a steak around Piccadilly without taking out a second mortgage, head to Flat Iron

6. Casually trying the Triple Chilli Challenge at MEATliquor/market/mission

Unless you've prepared, you will not come out of this alive. Get to work on prepping your stomach, jaw, and gag reflex.

7. Hitting Soho at 8pm on a Saturday without reservations... and you’re already hungry

Prepare to eat at 11pm. 

8. Getting the burger at Burger & Lobster

That is, unless you've already had a lobster. It IS a fantastic burger, after all. 

9. Ordering the lamb testicles at Testi

We’re the adventurous sort, but just... no.

10. Ordering chicken feet in Chinatown

Particularly at the end of a drinking session with your mates at 3am. It might just be that thing that pushes you over the edge. 

11. Not checking if service is included

They just want the tip. 

12. Being too loyal to your burger place

There are so many other good places.

13. Thinking Michelin stars are expensive

They can be ludicrously cheap.

14. Getting the fries at The Diner and not asking for the Cajun seasoning

Paprika, salt, pepper, cumin, oregano... WHY IS EVERYONE NOT DOING THIS?!

15. Complaining that you can never get into Dabbous

If you pop into Oskar’s Bar downstairs, you can get some pretty spectacular Dabbous menu-fillers without the three-month wait list. The BBQ short-rib with dill, mustard, and molasses, for one, is spectacular. Plus, cocktails.

16. Confining your Mexican food to burritos, Wahaca

Viva! The other, fantastic options!

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