It would only have been an appropriate size if our names were Andre the Giant or Amanda Bynes.
It’s like someone said, “You know, that 64oz margarita has enough liquor in it to kill a small horse, but you know what would make it a guaranteed trip to the stomach pump? Dumping a beer inside. Oh what the hell, make it an even two.”
When it arrived it stood so tall on the table you actually had to stand up to drink it. Probably a good idea so the liquor doesn’t all go to your head, but still more aerobic exercise than one should have to put into drinking on Ocean Drive.
They tell you they’re two-for-one. What they don’t tell you is two of them is actually the annual liquor consumption of some small countries, and therefore pretty impossible to finish during dinner. So essentially you end up spending the equivalent of the cost of a tank of gas on one drink. Welcome to Miami. Now go complain about it on Yelp.