Brash donuts in an understated shop

As if the relationship between cops and the pastries they eat wasn't stereotyped enough, it'd take a detective to find out about the insane donuts now being churned out by NE's Surdyk's Liquor. Or at least a gum-shoeing e-newsletter that happens to sake some pretty sexy donut photos

Using the kitchen's long-dormant fryer, everything's organic save the grapeseed oil, which actually makes for a crispier donut than other oils

All their glazes are scratch-made from high-end ingredients, which means this chocolate glazed with chocolate sprinkles is anything but vanilla

The bacon on this maple-glazer hails from Benton's Smoky Mountain Country Hams

Pour, some, (lemon-lavender) sugar on meeee thiiiiiis.

Cinnamon, cardamom, clove, and orange go into their Chai Spice, the favorite Spice Girl of new-age yuppies who swore off coffee

More chocolate, this time topped with hand-harvested sea salt, as if sharing the police force's secret go-to donut spot with the world didn't sting enough already.