SEX! That what seventh-graders do to advertise things, namely their highly developed senses of humor. The grownups in ad land, though, try to be a little more subtle. Sometimes What follows are 14 in-your-face-but-under-the-radar food ads ranging from Dorito-loving prostitutes, to a really happy Shrek, all of which were deemed totally ok to print:
Timothy DeLaGhetto and David So's Tips on Surviving Food Festivals
In 2006 there was a South American TV show called Sin Tetas, No Hay Paraiso -- Without T*ts, There Is No Paradise, seriously -- about a prostitute who really, really wanted massive breast implants to impress a cocaine dealer and make more money. Apparently all she had to do was walk around wearing nothing but Doritos.
A couple of decades ago, Coca-Cola proved Disney's not the only company capable of publishing hidden sex drawings, with this poster containing an image of a woman performing fellatio on an ice cube. Wait, that didn't read right. Performing fellatio, on something else, IN an ice cube. See? Much worse.
Of course, they've got nothing on old Disney...
There's just so much going on with this we're not really sure where to start, although we're reasonably certain Shrek finished.
This Claussen ad's pretty obvious, as no one wants a limp pickle, but it does make you wonder why the bespectacled old stork on the Vlasic label's always so happy.
It's entirely possible that the censors were so happy that an ad for BJ Cola didn't involve a woman doing something sassy with a bottle that they didn't even notice the butt here.
This actual billboard in Croatia for a long-standing meat company proves there's a serious shortage of pasties in the country (We put those on. Self-censored!).
This is Thermador's great contribution to your kitchen. It's called the Hot Food Server, and as you can see, it's stacked, and that dress does seem kinda convenient.
Bulgarians are a compassionate people. As part of this ad campaign, any woman that brought in a case of empty Flirt Vodka bottles would get a free set of knee pads, because it clearly caused every woman in the country to drop to her knees.
Remember Burger King's giant mascot king? He was creepy. This? It's just dinner, so you can tell your date you've got a super seven incher. And that she's got one too! Also, stop going on dates at Burger King.
Shortly after this ad ran in Denmark, they quit allowing liquor sponsors for senior proms.
To reflect a more liberal UK attitude towards both sex and canned meats, Heinz introduced names like Big Saucy Bangers. Do not ask for the ketchup.
Boobs. Australian for umbrella.
The moral of this Orangina ad featuring Pedobear isn't so much that you should complain to a censor, as much as it is that you should call adult protective services on everyone you see drinking Orangina.